"Religion has been the cause of many problems, especially in regards to assimilation by a foreign power. The imposition of a completely foreign and not relatable religion can cause much confusion and strife. Such was the case in Growing Up in Algeria. Assia Djebar, as a child, was caught up in whether to follow an Arabic or European viewpoint. She attended a foreign school that taught her French and all about France's customs. Her family though was Arabic and she felt much confusion and shame over what to believe and practice as a result of the assimilation of foreigners. 'At the age when I should be veiled already, I can still move about freely thanks to the French school ...' (Djebar 2). This statement by Djebar shows her thankfulness to the French while at the same time, in regards to her Quranic teacher, she says, 'I was struck by the elegance of his bearing ...' (Djebar 4). These differing claims prove the many problems, especially for children, caused by assimilation."
A major strength of Kyle's paper was how he worked from the general to specific. He started with a broad statement about religion causing problems and then worked his way towards how this affected one individual. His quotes were also effective in establishing Assia's character. Minor tidbits I thought could be improved included "a not relatable religion" (seems awkward) and setting off "though" with commas in the sentence beginning "Her family though." That fragment also seemed awkward to me. In the sentence when you say Assia was caught up whether to follow an Arabic or French viewpoint, expand upon what is in the realm of that "viewpoint." That term seems too general. Content wise, this is a terrific piece I recommend.
ReplyDeleteWill is giving excellent insight and i agree with him completely, he started out with a general topic that easily pertained to his purpose because it was so vague and then he broke apart his statement and gave explicit reasons on why it matters and what it means.
Deletei disagree. kyle only spent two sentences on the outside general topic. then, quickly, he announces his literary sources. he wasn't vague enough to start. this leaves little room for other opinion and insight beyond his passages.
DeleteI disagree with Kyle. He seems to be talking more about the French culture, not really the French teaching her a different religion. Often religion and culture are tied together, so maybe that is what Kyle is trying to say.
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