Here is an excerpt from WSh's paper. What are its strengths? How could he empower it?
"'To Eat a Peaceful Tortilla' is a brilliant piece because it doesn't want to be one. I say that because oftentimes, especially with older poems, unclear diction and confusing syntax can lead to a puzzled reader with no grasp on the poem's message. 'To Eat a Peaceful Tortilla' is the polar opposite of these poems in that its diction is refreshingly simple and its message is in plain sight. The poem reads 'The scramble to be president / is one of our oldest haunts / but to eat a peaceful tortilla / is all the poor man wants.' The author uses language to make political statements by using the images of the poor man and the tortilla to show the simplicity of the desires of most Latin Americans. The author is being political in that the message of the poem is that Latin Americans do not seek to be amazed by far-reaching promises or elaborate plans by leaders; they just want to live their lives without worrying about the violence and corruption so prevalent in Latin America. 'To Eat a Peaceful Tortilla' sums up this stance very well and its simplistic nature is undoubtedly a welcome change for poetry readers."
Well im a bit confused... Did will open his essay with the pronoun "I"..... is that allowed. Otherwise, will masterfully picked apart the poem for its nonchalant brilliance. His quote really expressed the attitude he was analyzing. He picked the perfect quote and backed it up smoothly.
ReplyDeleteYou make a good point Joe. I would probably argue on my own behalf... I could be biased :) but I think that the "I" was insignificant. Nevertheless, I should try to drop it out of my essays completely.
DeleteI love that opening sentence. It really sets up the rest of the paragraph and introduces the story effectively. The quote, like Joe said, has a strong impact on the paragraph in a positive way because it explains how To Eat a Peaceful Tortilla is a great story and how it does in fact help Will achieve his purpose.
ReplyDeleteI agree. Will's first sentence really sets up the argument and does a good job of pulling the reader in.
DeleteWill did a good job in this. The quote he uses expresses the attitude that he is analyzing. It helps out to show that To Eat a Peaceful Tortilla was a good story.
ReplyDeleteWill's first sentence does a very good job of setting up the rest of the passage. I agree with Will that although the language is somewhat simplistic, the meaning is still hidden very well within the poem, due to the unusual word choice. Even though the words are simple doesn't mean that the meaning will become any easier to decipher.
ReplyDeleteWill wrote a strong paragraph here though I must mention his use of "I" and a contraction. Also, he could have used a stronger word in certain places such as demonstrate instead of "show." Besides these minor errors though, the content and thinking behind the piece was great along with its explanation. Will obviously understood and, interpreted, and explained the text very well-especially for a poem.
ReplyDeleteI agree, the majority of Will's argument was really good, but he nees to clean up some of his finer points to make the essay really good.
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